Remember Fiza, the Malay friend of mine whose wedding I attended about a week ago?
Well, if there was one thing that I’d forgotten to mention earlier, it was the fact that her marriage was arranged by her parents. I don’t know about you, but personally, I don’t find it comfortable. In fact, I find it weird.
So in her case, I hope I get all this correctly or she’d strangle me alive, her parents arranged for her to meet her then “husband-to-be”. And then she was given some time to know him, to get along with him, to go on dates with him and so on and so forth. According to another friend whose marriage was also arranged by her parents, daughters are usually given about 2 years before the couple is expected to tie the knot. And in Fiza’s case, she and her then “husband-to-be” had gotten along quite well, and they were comfortable if they were to get married (meaning they don’t act like strangers anymore). And that was how she married him.
I don’t know, I’d find it very weird if I had to get along well with a guy because I eventually have to marry him. I mean, before I even considered him a friend, I already know that whether I liked him or not, I’d still have to marry him. AARRGGHH.. I know I’m not explaining this very well, but anyhow, I found quite some interesting reads on arranged marriages on Wikipedia. Now, go read it and tell me what you think, OK?
I was in KL two days ago to attend a Malay girlfriend’s wedding. It was really a last minute decision to attend her wedding because apparently, a few of my ex-coursemates suggested a mini reunion. See..? We suggested to have a mini reunion on one of our girlfriends’ wedding – we are a considerate bunch of friends, no? Hhahahah *slaps forehead*
One funny thing about Malay weddings, or so I found out, is that guests can come, help themselves with the food, and then leave the premise even before the bride and groom arrived. I mean, I thought we were all there to see the new husband-and-wife, to congratulate them, to bless them, to say hello to them?!
Anyway, the new couple arrived at the hall, walked in ala-Chinese on red carpet, with four flower girls dropping flower petals along the way. Then they were seated on the stage and their respective relatives went up and gave them their blessings. Imagine all these taking place on the stage, and their guests happily
gobbling munching away in the hall, oblivious to what was happening, which was, to me, a very important ceremony.
After the blessing ceremony, the new couple were ushered down the stage
to feast for lunch but I bet none of them enjoyed their lunch with soo many unidentified photographers shooting them. But at least in the next picture, our friend, Fiza (finally) acknowledged J’s presence and flashed him a smile! :)
Those of us who were present at Fiza’s wedding took a group photo with her (though we’d like to spend more time together) and her husband before we left.
Frankly, this was one of the grandest Malay wedding I’ve ever attended. We didn’t have to eat standing because there weren’t enough chairs, we didn’t have humongous fans blowing into our faces and ruining our hair, we didn’t have to sit under the canopy in the hot sun. But then again, these are what make traditional Malay weddings “Malaysian”, no?
More photos in my Flickr account (opens in a new window).